#1 parenting secret revealed for new dads

What is the #1 most important parenting rule in the world ever? Most of us experienced dads know this but some new dads might not be aware of the unwritten law of parenting. Revealed here on DIYFather.com for the first time in the history of dadkind:

NEVER GIVE ADVICE TO PARENTS WITH CHILDREN OLDER THAN YOURS

That's it ... nothing else matters. There's a few variations to this rule though (depending on your profession)

• Consultants: Don't give advice to other parents with older children unless you are getting paid for it
  
• Software Developers: If lastname(parent(B).child) = "Dotcom" exit();
  else if get_age(this.child) > get_age(parent(B).child) do dump_advice();
  
• Plastic Surgeons: Don't give advice to other parents with children prettier than yours

The Money Game

As a parent and someone who is interested in creating wealth, helping my little lady become financially savvy when she grows up is very important. I come from a wealthy family that "gave their children fish, rather than actually teaching them to fish". So I thought it was timely now to teach my 4 year old girl Pyper about money and finances. We have started getting her used to money - she picks up bits of money that is either lying around in coins or someone might give her $5 here and there for a birthday. I firmly believe that parents who introduce the concept of "saving money" to their children early will be helping them in the long run. I recently came across an article that talked about practical steps parents could do to teach financial literacy to their children.

Dads. Sex. Aprons.

Dads. Want more sex? Do this.

You don't need a better aftershave, or buff biceps. If you want a better sex life, research says: help out at home. That's right. The men who enjoy the most bedroom benefits turn out to be the ones who work out in the kitchen and playroom.

Think of foreplay as an apron and dishsoap.

That's the word from several long term studies and surveys. Dr. John Gottman, who's run a 'love lab' at the University of Washington for two decades, finds wives are more sexually attracted to mates who pitch in with housework. Women see help with chores as a sign of love and caring, Gottman says, and that makes them more likely to get 'in the mood'.

Common Reactions to Being a Stay and Home Dad and How to Deal with Them

In one study published in Psychology of Women Quarterly in 2005, researchers from Yale University looked at the attitudes of our culture at large towards traditional and non-traditional families. The researchers defined traditional as a family with a working father and stay-at-home mother, and non-traditional families as families with a working mother and a stay-at-home father. The results of these studies were quite interesting, and they just go to show what some of the common reactions to stay-at-home dads are.

The researchers in this study found that people liked traditional families more, and that they expressed negative attitudes – usually very openly! – towards non-traditional families. Stay-at-home dads were somehow viewed as less-than by other people, and working mothers were not well-respected or well-liked unless they were working because of financial necessity rather than for personal fulfillment.

Dad in da house - pests

Pest control can mean a lot of things to a lot of people. Taking care of pests is a pest (usually) - here are some tips for busy dads to take control of pests so the little ones are not bothered by them.

Things to consider:

1. Don’t delay: When it comes to pest control fathers have to realize the consequences of delayed action. First of all it can only make matters worse as insects have an uncanny ability to reproduce quickly and if there are a few now you can count on there being more soon. Second, when kids or other family members are involved it’s best to take care of the situation speedily to ease their discomfort.

Birth Plans

Many parents are asked to make Birth Plans during the last stage of their pregnancy. As dads we love plans of course (why ask for directions when you've got a map ...) Well, here's the problem - you can't really plan a birth. What you want might not happen and what you dread might happen (or the other way round). Whatever happens happens. At the end of the day you just don't know beforehand how things will pan out and no one else does either. At a certain level birth is mysterious.

Using Superpowers to Make Your Infant Fall Asleep

Yes, I have a superpower. I call it "The Brahms" superpower. You see, I trained (conditioned?) both my kids to calm down and fall asleep (or back asleep) by singing them a very common lullaby. My first child had colic, and the tune on her musical mobile over her crib was Brahms' Lullaby, probably the most recognizable baby sleeping song.

When you wind it, it plays for 3 minutes before slowing and eventually stopping. That wasn't enough for my infant. So, I began hovering over her crib and sang it ... for an hour at a time. Throat parched, voice crackling, it became a battle of wills. She would scream, and I would just keep with my calm “la la-la” tune and stroking her back.

Honey we're wrecking the kids

Every parent should watch this ... brilliant stuff about how we (the parents) and our education system is wrecking our kids ...

Enjoy,

Stef

Baby Gone

Just found out about an amazing book called "Baby Gone" ... the book is tackling a really difficult topic that unfortunately many parents are dealing with - miscarriage, stillbirth and infant loss. Rather than offer any advice the book simply tells the stories of parents who have experienced losing a baby or infant. Tragically one in 3 to one in 4 parents will be faced with miscarriage or losing their baby - so this book is highly relevant to many parents.

For more information visit babygone.com.

-Stefan

What you need to know about cyber bullying

According to the Cyberbullying Research Center, it is estimated that 10-40% of today's kids experience cyber bullying in one form or another. For some, bullying may seem like a rite of passage. But for others, the negative effects of cyberbullying can be debilitating. Distractions that arise from cyber bullying can make students lose focus in school, be withdrawn from their families, and fall victim to all levels of harassment. As dads we must be aware of what's going on to be able to intervene, help or support.

What is cyberbullying?
Cyber bullying is like traditional bullying, the behavior is the same, but technology is used to expand the environment in which bullying takes place. E.g. posting embarrassing videos and texting hateful words/threats all fall under the realm of cyber bullying.

What can I do about it?