Fathers everywhere struggle to protect their children against poverty. The fortunate ones manage to provide a certain degree of comfort and material security. Both groups try to fulfill what they naturally perceive as a fundamental role-that of provider. It seems to me that this role has tended to be all too easily minimized. It is as though in the effort to recognize the father who is affectionate, who acts as teacher and companion, and who is committed and interactive, the role of breadwinner has been neglected, if not actually ignored and even scorned. And yet fathers themselves have not forgotten this role, as evidenced by their vulnerability and distress when they fail to fulfill it adequately.

Fathers seem to understand that while this role may not be enough in and of itself, it is a necessary one. The fact that over 60 percent of poor children live in single-parent households where the single parent is a woman (while only 13 percent of poor children live in two-parent households) would seem to indicate that they are right. There is no way to hide it: of all paternal roles, that of provider is perhaps the most thankless. Granted, for the advertising industry, the image of the father sitting at his desk or operating a machine tool is less desirable and romantic than that of the father standing in a sports arena cheering on his daughter or son, but that doesn't diminish its importance. Fathers who, after losing their jobs, go through depression, marital troubles or conflicts with their adolescent children describe the significance of this role in their lives with great eloquence. They say that a father's responsibility is also to make sure their child has food on the table, a warm and safe place to live, stability, a solid place in the community and good prospects for the future.

In this respect too, service providers and even groups who promote paternal involvement have some thinking to do. Obviously, this is not to question the validity of initiatives such as discussion groups for fathers or activities to develop parenting skills; however, much more attention should probably be given this traditional-yet-vital role of breadwinner. Above all, the promotion of other paternal roles should not lead to the neglect of what most fathers still perceive as their primary responsibility: contributing to the economic well-being of their families.

Yes, teaching fathers to cook and to play with their children is crucial. However, it is also just as crucial to provide concrete support in the area of income or employment, a source of great stress and vulnerability for fathers, especially when their income is low or their employment is insecure. Fathers who have trouble making ends meet, whose jobs are threatened or who have recently lost their jobs, are fathers who need support; and it is perhaps in just such situations of great personal vulnerability, which are also situations of high risk for family life, that support should be given priority. Fathers who are secure in their role as "provider" are generally much more available to take on the other parenting tasks that their spouses and children expect of them, allowing them to concentrate fully on their role as "nurturer."

Thus, the job of a father is this: to help his children develop-to teach them to express and master their emotions; to avoid physiological distress; to provide a context for their experiences; to help them persevere, reach their goals and take on responsibilities; and to instill the roles of citizen, partner and parent. In short, it is to fill their bellies with bread, their brains with wisdom and their hearts with love and courage.

Article sourced from a publication from the Public Health Agency of Canada

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