What is the argument between natural and medical birth?

Dear New Zealand DIYFather-to-be

You’re in a bind here torn between two very opposing viewpoints of childbirth. Where should you stand?

On the one hand NZ midwives are strong proponents of ‘natural’ birth, believe childbirth is inherently safe and that a natural birth is better than a medical one. If you think the word ‘natural’ has ever been defined with a common meaning think again.

Let’s be practical. If you lived in a culture where there was no medical care available then anything and everything that happened in birth would be ‘normal’ and ‘natural’ although it might be unpleasant or infrequent. There are still hundreds of millions of people live without access to modern medical care. However, you live in a very modern country with a great maternity health service. In New Zealand the word ‘natural birth’ implies a lack of medical ‘interventions’’ and implies birth will be spontaneously easy as well as safe.

On the other hand most New Zealand obstetric specialists strongly believe that childbirth potentially can be unsafe for either mother or child and that modern maternity assessments, monitoring and procedures (interventions) are essential. Of course, no one has really defined ‘intervention’ either.

So where does this leave you?

Before you answer this question just consider this other question … is the birth of your baby important to you and your partner? Of course. This simplifies things tremendously. Instead of worrying about whether your birth will be natural or surrounded by medical care, isn’t better to make certain that you can always work with your baby’s efforts to be born?

Sadly, this is not the common approach to childbirth in New Zealand because NZ does not have a skilled birthing population of mothers and fathers who have skills to use in whatever birth unfolds. Without skills, the focus of childbirth is this political division that causes too much shame, blame and guilt.

A wise man will not put him self in the middle of a debate that is beyond his control. However, a wise man learns the skills to be in control of how he responds to whatever is happening around him. In other words, if you play rugby, cricket or another sport you know you cannot control the weather, the other team or even your teammates but with skills you can control how you play. You might not be perfect but you can perfect your skills through practice. This is the same for birth. Giving birth is an activity and vigorous like a sporting event.

Without skills childbirth can feel out of control

Even in the most medical birth, your pregnant partner will be doing the activity of giving birth even if there are tubes in every hole of her body. Don’t you want her to have skills to do this activity well? You’re expected to be some form of support. Don’t you actually want to know how to help her do this activity?

Any woman can do this activity easily if it were not connected with intense naturally occurring pain.

• Without skills it’s mighty hard to cope with intense birth pain for hours.

Without skills it’s very easy to feel out of control and want to be taken care of. It’s very easy to ask for medical pain relief (which is an intervention) or want to get the birth over with if it’s gone on for too long (stimulating labour or Caesarean delivery … interventions).

• Without skills and little exposure to hundreds of births it’s easy to confuse the natural pain with a potential problem.

You need to know that although midwives and obstetric specialists don’t agree on much they do agree on one thing … the pain of childbirth is not a problem nor does it indicate a problem and should not be treated as a problem.

With skills childbirth is manageable

With skills you can always work with your baby’s efforts to be born even if medical interventions are part of your birth experience but you have to learn them first.

Let the political debate swirl around you. Spend the last precious months of pregnancy learning how to:

• Prepare your pregnant partner’s body to let out a big object.

Giving birth is an exercise in plumbing … a 3 dimensional object (your baby) has to come out of the inside of another 3 dimensional object (your partner’s body). Men are so good at seeing this process!

• Learn together the birth and coaching skills that will allow both of you to always work with your baby’s efforts to come out.

Many skilled families still need medical care so they just work and along side all the assessments, monitoring and procedures and still feel they birthed better than if they didn’t have the skills.

And, dear expectant father, please use the 5 phases of pregnancy to grow some wonderful fathering qualities so that you will feel confident and comfortable with your newborn.

If you do these things then you will have memories of success. You will always birth better with skills rather than feel passive or just hope you have a lucky birth.

Birth is birth whether natural or medical. Birth politics should not leave you feeling disappointed or still trying to process the experience or just relieved its over or take away your delight when welcoming your child.

For the essential pregnancy and birth skills for both expectant parents go to Birthing Better and get The Pink Kit Package. The author of this article is Wintergreen, a Trustee to the New Zealand registered charitable Trust called Common Knowledge that produces The Pink Kit Method For Birthing Better®.