White Ribbon Day - 25th November

White Ribbon Day, 25 November, is the international day when people wear a white ribbon to show that they do not condone male violence towards women. It was started by a men's movement in Canada in 1991 and has been officially adopted by the United Nations as its International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women.

New Zealand has a high rate of male violence towards women. In 2004 there were just over 3,100 convictions recorded against men for assaults on a woman and a 2001 national victims of crime study showed that close to one in five women experienced sexual assault or sexual interference at some point in their lives.

I'm not against the initiative that White Ribbon has, but why is it just Violence done against women? Will there ever be a White Ribbon day equivalent for Men? There is no denying that there are men that beat women in relationships, but just addressing that problem, will it make a difference?

What about violence done to men? There are studies done in New Zealand that the proportion of violence is 50/50, and women are more likely to use weapons, but where are the male victims? To be a man is to be strong and tough, a macho man. God forbid ever admitting that your wife had ever beaten you and that you are afraid off her? Who would listen anyway? If he was to call the police, he would likely be the one removed from the family home to find his own accommodation, is there such a thing as shelters for men suffering from family violence? I would be very interested to know.

Why can't White Ribbon day just be against family violence? In fact why does it have to be such a negative message? Why not a campaign for Loving families and families that do work in harmony?

What is more likely to make a difference is not focusing on what doesn’t work, like domestic violence but rather role models, the families in our society that really stand out as families. It is done with sports, athletes are not inspired to become better athletes buy focusing on what doesn’t work or poor athletes, no they focus their energy on great athletes, to learn and pick up techniques from these star athletes, and they better themselves and become great star athletes themselves, we all can become great athletes of families buy doing the same and focus on what does work.

If you are going to wear a white ribbon, spare a thought to the unrecognized victims of violence, and turn your attention to a family you know that inspires you.

- Eric