Getting some (any) sleep after the arrival of your new bundle of joy can be a real tricky one for new parents. Dads of couples who have decided to breastfeed are in an interesting situation in that most males just can't do it (breast feeding) and often there is not enough bottled milk to last the whole night. So our usefulness for night feeds is limited to emotional support or nappy changing. So I've decided to go the other way and have made sure I get a full night sleep. I use ear plugs for that - works for us.

OK so we have stuck with a more traditional model of parenting in that my partner stays home and looks after our son, whereas I go earn some money. After the arrival of our first baby I quickly realised that getting up at night and working during the day is not great. I ended up being pretty ineffective during the day at work as well as with the little things I could help with at night. Even when we agreed that I should stay in bed I would still wake up a couple of times every night and it took me a wee while to get back to sleep.

Although it seems a bit cruel at times (to leave it all to Raquel at night) the ear plugs really do help. Especially because they usually ensure that I don't wake up when the baby cries – so I end up sleeping through most nights, which does wonders to my effectiveness during the day.

Unplugged
At weekends the ear plugs are off. I generally try to balance it out a little bit by doing some of the "early night feeding shifts" with bottled milk and getting up at night to help when the baby doesn't settle.

Does the whole thing make me a bad husband? I don't think so – I can support Raquel much better when I get back from work because I'm rested.

Cheers,

Stef

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