The "Did you know you were gay?" question

Thanks

Hi Peter. I appreciate your comments.

If my inner thoughts make people think and create a reaction, that in my opinion is a positive thing. Whether individuals like it or not, there are lots of guys like me out there. A minority yes but loving committed dads just the same. And that is my only axe to grind. I will of course base my thoughts on my own personal experiences. I am not going to base them on anyone else’s now am I?
I generally believe that a collective is that, a collective. Not an edited sanitized version of someone's interpretation of what is deemed acceptable. I have a right to my opinions. My gay male friends include a marksman in MI5, a soldier, a builder and many others over the years that can crack bones by staring at them. I am an avid climber, I go green laneing in the best boys toy you can have, a brand spanking new, 4x4 Land Rover Defender in my spare time. I am more masculine than many of my hetero friends. I have a mix of people from all backgrounds in my life, and I have learnt a lot from this. It is interesting to see that you feel your opinion is deemed more valid than mine, just because you are straight. To quote “Thought this was about being a dad and better fathering ideas...? Not sexual inclination... save it for other web sites thx!”
I don’t recall going into any detail about my sex life, and that was exactly my point. My stance is that of a man who is a dad and who happens to be gay, and finding that people are more interested in my sexuality, than my talents as a father. This is born of ignorance and that was my point.
My thoughts were about encouraging open honest communication with our children, In order to do this we sometimes have to face our own demons and grow as an individual; easier said than done I know.
I don’t have an axe to grind fella. I am most defiantly more together and happier than the majority of people I meet. Two vital components in being a successful parent.
Life experience varies little from person to person. The journey may have a different view, but we all feel the same in our hearts and heads. It is only ever a matter of degree.
I'll keep my postings "reasonably" palatable!

My final word on the subject (I promise and then I'll get off my soap box) is that Em, my daughter has the final say and we have a fantastic relationship that other "straight" dads who have had to dad remotely, would look on and envy, given the same set of circumstances. I have a lot to offer anyone open enough to hear me based on being a dad of 20 years.

Be happy mate!

Paul

Hey Peter - you're a good sport re being off topic! :-) I see where you're coming from ... this site will not turn into a winge fest on any topic. I think it's fair enough though to cover a wide range of dad related topics (including racial discrimination and saving the planet ... if and when it is relevant). We received quite a few emails from people saying that they hoped our site also covered topics that are not just about the "conventional" married with 2.4 kids happy family. If you feel that we are giving any particular topic too much presence - please let us know. -Stef

I've been a Stay-at-Home Dad for many years and have met a few other's like me.
What bugs me is that some feel they have to act like women, become effeminate. I kept my counsel but i wanted to scream " be a man, ya girl's blouse". Maybe they were gay, i don't know and i don't care.
After spending all week talking to women and children, i would've gone completely nuts if not every Thursday night, I would go out with my male mates.
It was fantastic to be gruff, shallow and coarse one day a week.
Talking to women is hard work...

So finding out about a male forum for parenting felt like a godsend to me. To have it taken over by gay angst is not what i want to happen...
I know just don't read them, but i was hopeful of knocking it on the head before you get every gay with some percieved sob story logging on and revealing all.
Isn't being a Maori,Polynesian or Asian father coming on this site and complaining about racism a little bit off topic too? I believe so.
Maybe it's not, maybe i have it all wrong. But i felt this article had crossed the line into another area.
Stories about getting frowned upon by women, sick children and activities to do with your children are all things most father's can relate to and are interested in.

Stories on Racism,Gay issues and Saving the Planet are all valid but can go on the other forums that populate the web. Whadda ya thunk?

Ug...I've fallen into my own trap... this is sooo off topic!

Hey Peter - this site is not predominately about sexual preferences or inclination. But it is about sharing experiences of fathers around the world. Paul is doing just that - sharing his experiences as a gay dad and how other people react to that. So I do think his story has a place on our site.

Thought this was about being a dad and better fathering ideas...?

Not sexual inclination... save it for other web sites thx!