It seems to me the stuff that is the most important when becoming a first time father is the stuff that no-one has written anywhere. Women have hundreds of books and other women to talk to, but men being as communicative as we are never seem to pass on the knowledge of birth and the other adjoining phases. Men need to know as well! There needs to be a book written by men for men and it should be named BIRTH FOR DUMMIES (men). Chapter 1 Mood swings and the basic remedies too, Chapter 2 Shit that Women buy that you don't really need, Chapter 3 It's not all your fault she joined in as well, Chapter 4 The midwife is she any good etc etc. To me we are sitting high and dry in the knowledge pool (hence having none).

The first thing I found that no-one had told me was a birthing plan. Plan what plan water falls all over the floor you both scream and then run for the car and race to the hospital, Nope, first you need to read about natural birth (no drugs), Water birth (obviously in a bath or pool) and last is a Epidural which is a injection that is placed into the spinal cord removing a lot of the pain but it does have side effects, so what do you choose and who gives you all of the correct information and advice? That's easy just make sure you bring it up as a first point with your Midwife on the first visit so you have all the time to digest your options and make an informed decision.

The second thing, are the aches pains and movements all normal? When you are a first time father you don't know if this is supposed to be happening, you feel so helpless, you are supposed to be the big protector and all you can do is sit there and watch, so I have found the best thing to do is to ring your midwife and ask. They are paid to be there 24 hours a day so use them; they have done this multiple times and know what is normal and what's not.

Well I'm only half way there and I've already had a few hiccups so if you have any ideas or information to pass on write a blog and throw it out there for all to use and hopefully men will be more informed and able to cope with the job of child birth, then it won't be so stressful and scary.

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